She is the type of person who looks at the menu for five minutes but ends up ordering the same exact thing every time!

My missus.. I do love her most of the time.

We went to Pizza hut 'again' last night. She cant get enough of their 'Barbeque Chicken' Pizza.

Its OK for the first slice but its too sweet for me.

On the way to Pizza hut she remarked how much she is looking forward to this 'Barbeque Chicken' Pizza..

I know what i'm having.. A meat Pizza. Anyone will do. i'm not bothered. They all taste the same anyway..

So I think we will have a good turnaround. Get in. Order. Eat. Leave.

But she asks for a menu..

She studies each Pizza and reads outs the ingredients.. Each one she says hmmmm this one sounds nice doesn't it?

The waitress comes over and my missus asks for a few more minutes.

I'm starting to get the hump.

I reminded her that she always has the same pizza.. that she had already mentioned on the way to the restaurant that she was looking forward to the 'Barbeque Chicken' Pizza..

The waitress comes over again and my missus places her order - I will have the 'Barbeque Chicken' Pizza please..

..I nearly threw my Coke into her face.

Play Doh is the devil!

I have a 2 year old.

He fricking loves Play Doh... I do not..

The worst of the Play Doh is the Brown one of course..

I thought I just found shite on the floor (maybe from my cat? (I hate my cats! (that's another story..)))

So firstly I shouted some nasty names at my cats (Brian and Betty by the way) and then started to get some tissue to pick up the 'shite'

Well it was not only quite hard but it was dried into my carpet... With my gentle grab (not wanting to put my finger into the shite!) I couldnt budge it.

It only then come to mind that it might be Play Doh..

I kneeled down and gave the 'shite' a cautious sniff..

Thankfully the smell of shite was not present and the some what comforting smell of Play Doh was present.

I done away with the tissue and picked it up with my fingers.

Straight into the bin.

And I still managed to get it under my finger nails.

If any more friends or family buy it for my kid; I am going to throw it out of the window right in front of them.

Christmas weight and impending diet!

Christmas was alright.

I enjoy giving presents more than receiving. Mainly because family buy me crap presents but also due to the fact that throughout the year; if there is something that I want - I just go and get it!

Anyway - The one thing that I dislike most about Christmas is the extra weight I put on.

I am not exactly 'slim' to start with so even more weight on me is just not good.
In fact I could have played a rather good Santa Claus this year!

So from Jan 1st I look forward to losing all the weight. But what diet to go for this time?

My problem is that from Christmas day until New Years Eve I feel I need to get a shite load of food in to then lose from the following week!

I dont help myself but yet I cannot bring myself to throw away all the nice food and drink we have in the house!

Heres to pigging out on these last bottles of wine and beer; cheeses, meats, cakes and chocolates.

I hope you had a good Christmas and a great new year.

I hate diets :(

Emails crashing!

Is it just me or does your emails crash only when you are really busy and you really need them right now!

I have sooooo much to do with too little time to do it as it is!

I write this in my 'down time' because I am waiting for my supplier to fix my emails!

My internet is obviously working otherwise I wouldn't be writing this..

Why do email systems just crash? I'm sure there is a technical reason why?

Anyone care to offer their opinion?

If you DONT give me YOUR opinion - I didn't want yours anyway!

Idiot!

Hangovers whilst getting 'older'

I am young.

Well I am 'just' about still in my 20's and I constitute that as being young..

Perhaps whatever age you are - you think yourself young?

Anyway besides the point. What I am experiencing is that hangovers are getting worse.

I drink same types of alcohol and I believe around the same volume?

But I now have a hangover for around 48hours!!

I remember going to Cyprus when I was 18. We would have a skin full night after night with no let up. We just didn't have hangovers..


I wonder what it could be?

Is it literally as you get older you body absorbs the alcohol and keeps it for longer?

Or is it that I am not dancing about as energetically as I did as a teen? So not sweating it out?

I don't have a kebab before bed anymore - Maybe the food absorbs?

Perhaps I am drinking more or is it better quality /stronger alcohol?


Your suggestions please?

They say 'Dont eat McDonalds'!

McDonalds - Im loving it!

So to those who think they know more than me and judge me

No matter how many gross facts you tell me about McDonald’s; I am still going to eat it and you are not going to stop me!

Rant over, but lets look at some facts.

--

We only use whole cuts of 100% British and Irish beef in our burgers, seasoned with just a pinch of salt and pepper after cooking.

--

McDonald's Chicken McNuggets are made from 100% chicken breast meat.

However, as a percentage of the total recipe when the batter, seasoning and oil to cook the nuggets are taken into account, chicken meat constitutes 45% of the total Chicken McNugget, the other ingredients account for the additional 55%. You can find full ingredients information by clicking 'Ingredient List', which is in the ‘Food' section of www.mcdonalds.co.uk.

--

Im happy with that..

Bad breath

Is there any reason for it?

That I understand - I have never had bad breath. Or at least no one has ever told me.

I replace my tooth brush every 3 months.

And brush my teeth twice daily, floss and use mouth wash.

I keep to 6 monthly check ups at the dentists.

But my friend seems to think it is acceptable not to go to the dentist. He waits until he has a tooth ache.

I think it must be 10 years since he last went!

I write this now because I think it is getting out of hand.

There is an aura of stink that follows him around.

I swear the room has filled with this stink also. I went out of the room and just come back in.

It smells.

What can I do?

Dont you hate it when they kick the back of your seat in the movies!

I went to see a movie recently.

What movie? That is irrelevant!

What is relevant was the little shite sitting directly behind me!

At one point I wanted to strangle him!

OK so it wasn't a constant bang, bang, bang, bang..

Because if it was - I would have lost control and lashed out. He would have got hurt. I would have got arrested.

..But it was more of an irregular bang, bang like he was tossing and turning during the film; trying to get comfortable / turning to talk to a friend / dropping things..

Regular in its irregularity..

Thinking about it - I have also had the same trouble on a flight as well as on buses and trains..

Maybe I attract these idiots?

I may have to say something next time.. - but what can I say?

Saying it 'pristine' when it wasnt!

I went to see a car last night.

The advert claimed that it was in 'pristine' condition.

I don't know about you, but to me the word 'pristine' means something is in great condition.
Maybe even better than great. Perhaps showroom condition?!

At worse case scenario I expected great condition..

The pictures from 10 feet looked good anyway so I planned the viewing..

Well I was disappointed.

Not only for the travel time it took for me to view the car.
But that I gave a friend some cash for fuel..
And I now owe him a favour!

The car was not 'pristine'

The car wasn't even in 'great' condition!

It was barely average condition..

I let the seller know this fact and that I wasn't happy with his description..

I pointed out several deep scratches / scuffs and rust patches!

What an idiot!

Another summer of false promises at Arsenal?

Now this is the headline from 'The Sun'

I'm not sure who I am more pissed off at yet?

Am I more pissed off at 'The Sun' for printing such a thing? As I don't want to read such a thing!

I want to believe that this is the summer for Arsenal. That this is the summer of top signings. so that we can once again be champions... of something! ....Anything! I will even take the league cup!
Yes I am that desperate for Arsenal to win silverware that I will accept the league cup..

Or is it that I am more pissed off with Arsenal.

Dear Arsenal
I love you
But please no more bullshit and spend some money! We; the supporters need to see some action!
...Soon!

Here is the full story.

MY VIEW
By MARK IRWIN
Football correspondent

 

 

 

WHEN I woke up in my Japanese hotel this morning there were three text messages from Arsenal fans on my phone.

Two were asking for news of any possible signings, the other was already calling for the heads of Arsene Wenger and Ivan Gazidis.
And so it begins. The annual Emirates tap-dance. In which the club promises the earth then delivers Andre Santos and Maraoune Chamakh.
We have been here so many times before that even the most optimistic Gunners fans have stopped allowing their hopes to be raised.
Except this time it feels somehow different. A line has been crossed and Wenger will no longer be allowed to backtrack.
He has promised stellar signings this summer and he has to deliver them. If he breaks his word again, no-one will trust Arsene.
Travelling with the club these past two weeks on their pre-season tour of the Far East, it is evident that it is not just the supporters demanding proper, big-name buys.
Everyone within the club is also convinced that Wenger is about to break the habits of a lifetime and spend some money as though it is not coming out of his own pocket.
Even the players are asking what we have heard. They are every bit as eager for an injection of new blood.
All these expectations have been raised by an interview which chief executive Gazidis gave last month, when he spoke of the club’s new ‘financial firepower’ and their ability to compete for the very best players in the world.
Many believe his words were deliberately chosen to apply some pressure to the cautious Wenger.
It is why Arsenal have been heavily linked with the likes of Luis Suarez, Wayne Rooney and Gonzalo Higuain in recent weeks.
But there is only so many times that we can write ‘Arsenal are set to make a new bid for Suarez’ before a sceptical public switch off.
For if Arsenal were serious about buying the Liverpool striker, they would have gone straight in with an offer which Brendan Rodgers could not refuse rather than submitting a bid which they knew was certain to be rejected.
Now it appears Wenger is relying on Suarez throwing his toys out of the pram and forcing his way through the Anfield exit. Though whether he could be any more objectionable is open to debate.
Wenger is certainly not giving anything away right now. He refuses to discuss any potential targets and seemed to take great delight in knocking down reports that he was about to sign Brazilian midfielder Bernard the other day.
Gazidis, too, has gone strangely quiet in recent days. We keep hearing rumours that he is flying back to London to seal this or that deal, but he is still out here in Japan and feels he has already said more than enough.
It is a good job for him that Manchester United have also failed to land any of their big-time targets so far this summer while Chelsea have yet to prise Rooney from Old Trafford.
And maybe Arsenal will yet surprise us all by unveiling a new superstar in the next few days.
But I wouldn’t hold your breath if I were you.
A week on Saturday, Arsenal face Napoli in the Emirates Cup. If Yaya Sonogo is the only new face on show for the Gunners, expect fireworks.
Wenger is already into the final year of his £7.5million-a-year contract and has stretched the supporters’ loyalty to its limit.
A storm is brewing and Wenger had better get his brolly out.


Read more: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/5029560/Arsenal-transfers-look-like-false-promises-again-MARK-IRWIN.html#ixzz2Zs5T9fIv